Tuesday, February 14, 2012

Happy Valentines Day to Me


You can run.  You can hide your head under your pillow.  You can avoid the Hallmark aisle. 

And yet.

Whether you be a sighing romantic or a disdainful realist, you cannot deny that today is Valentines Day. 

I have had one Valentines Day date in the whole of my existence, and I hope it stays on record as the spiciest I'll ever have.  My boyfriend at the time and I liked cooking and decided it would be fun to cook Valentines' dinner at a friend's apartment.  I concocted a recipe in my head and ran it by him.  He went for it, so "Creamy Chipotle Chicken" it was.  We got all the stuff at the grocery store, and he insisted on also getting a pineapple.  Little did I know (literary code for: something crazy is about to happen) that pineapple would save the day. 

We browned the chicken, browned the onions, and I diced the chipotle peppers.  *Note to all blossoming chefs - taste things as you go!!  In my experience, chipotle peppers had added a sweet, barbecued peppery taste, so I added them liberally.  We stirred in some sour cream and put it on a bed of pasta.  One bite, and I knew all my chipotle experience was all a mistake.  Soon there were cheeks blushing and eyes watering, and let me tell you, it had nothing to do with the romantic nature of Valentines Day.  We struggled through a few more bites before throwing in the forks and deciding burning fiery holes into our stomach lining wasn't worth it.  Thankfully, there was the pineapple, which we ate as a sweet fire extinguisher. 

That was two years ago.  This year, I'm in Australia.  My travel buddy, SG is currently having a dinner/lunch date with her bf by Skype.  I didn't have any dates, so I climbed the hedge instead.  This is no ordinary 5 foot hedge.  It's an ancient bastion of brush, towering closer to 20 feet tall.  



Disclaimer:  If you do something less than intelligent, don't blame it on me.  I don't recommend you go around climbing hedges.    

At first, the going was quite dusty and prickly, as I came up through the core onto the top of the wall of hedge.  I made my way along the top, leaving my t-shirt braided anklet as a flag marking the way back down.  It was becoming a pretty blasé adventure when the idea hit me.  Why would I go back down the tunnel hole if I could climb down the abutting tree? 

This is where I advise parents and small children to stop reading. 

I weight tested a couple branches and made sure they were green and alive instead of dead and prone to snappage.  I weighed my risk.  How much trouble would I get in if I fell and had to go to the doctor with a broken leg?  How far was this on the stupid spectrum?  Can I swing my legs up and inch my way along the branch to the trunk?  All pre-adventure risk management is theoretical.  There must be a moment where you either walk away or seize the day (or the tree branch). 

I seized the tree branch, stood on the edge of the hedge, leaned out as far as I could to the bigger part of the branch and let go of the hedge with my feet.  Being green, the leafy bough dipped, more than I was expecting.  I worked my hands toward the trunk and tip toed my way on a smaller branch within tip toe reach of my feet.  I finally made it down, heart chugging and covered in smallish scratches.  It was interesting, but I'm not planning on doing it again any time soon.

Tonight I plan on having a SG/Sunshine date and finding a girly movie and eating chocolate.  You don't own me, Hallmark, but I will enjoy my Valentines Day!


Much love,

Little Miss Sunshine

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