All Sexed Out

I'm all sexed out. 

I'm tired of a culture that is fiercely enslaved to sex.  It is wearying not to be able to buy a toothbrush without someone trying to convince me that somehow I'll be transformed into a 5'7" blonde with blindingly white teeth if I use their toothbrush.  Let's not even talk about shampoo commercials.  Eck.  Everywhere I look, sex.  Pinterest is convinced that if I do this butt workout, I'll be sexier.  If I slather my hair with jojoba oil, cow manure and chopped licorice, I'll be sexier.  Facebook thinks I need to get on SingleMingle or Match.com or I'mSingleandIKnowIt to meet sexy single guys. Let's not sell them bag of Doritos because they taste good, let's sell them a bag of Doritos because they're sexy.  I'm not sure I could buy a paperclip without being harangued about its sleek, sexy design.  Oh, and wherever sexy went, JT is bringing it back.

Movies?  TV?  Magazines?  How I Met Your Mother?  Barney's whole character is built on his addiction to getting girls to sleep with him.  New Girl?  The newest episode was called "Virgins".  It covered how all the main characters lost their virginity.  Yeah, classy.  Friends?  I think they shortened the title from "Friends Having Sex with Friends".  Try to think of a movie lately that didn't either imply the main characters having sex or show the leading lady in a plunging V, high heels and mini skirt.  Every time I go to the grocery store, Trashy McTrash Teen Trasherson wants to tell me all about the top 1,000 ways to have better sex.  We are obsexed.

There are whole industries built on sex, some of them deemed more pardonable than others.  People think it's more OK to watch people having sex on the internet than to go hire a child prostitute.  "Porn is just maybe a weakness or something to do on the weekends."  "Child prostitution is a whole other ball game."  "That doesn't happen here.  That's stuff they make movies about in other countries where Liam Neeson goes and kills bad guys."  There's a whole slave industry sustained by a culture who is enslaved to sex.  How are we so blind that WE ENSLAVE PEOPLE TO FEED OUR ADDICTION TO SEX? 

Here's the kicker.  Sex is not the problem.  Friends, who created sex in the first place?  Nope, Adam and Eve did not invent sex.  Get ready for this one…

God did. 

Now, if there's one thing I know about God, it's that He loves community.  He is the Trinity, which is like community on steroids.  He sent Jesus to die so that we could be restored to community with Him.  He designed the community of the Church to love and help each other and the people around them.  He designed marriage as an expression of community, and as a stable place for kids to grow up in.  God created sex as an expression of vulnerability and intimacy in marriage. 

It's a pity I don't have a whiteboard right now, because I would draw you this picture.  Use your imagination.  Big circle with the word COMMUNITY inside it.  This is where God wants all people to live.  No one was meant to be alone, even nomads travel in bunches.  He's given us all kind of things to do in this circle - eat food, work, volunteer, hang out, play sports, knit scarves, whatever you're into.  Inside the COMMUNITY circle, I'd draw another circle and write MARRIAGE in it.  God designed marriage.  It's a good thing.  It's a thing that most people should pursue.  Marriage is great for communities.  It stabilizes people.  It makes better kids.  Within that marriage circle, I'd write a list of things that married people should be doing, stuff like serving each other, working hard, blessing the people around them, spending time with wise people, modeling the kind of love that Christ has for the Church, having sex, cleaning house, having fun, etc. etc.  Did you notice how much of the pie sex got?  Yeah, it got a decent sized slice in the marriage pie, which is a decent slice of the community pie. 

We have taken a good thing that God made for married people and made it this grandiose experience/industry/image/culture.  And it's wrecking us.  But that's how idols work.  They hurt people.  They cause pain.  They trick you into thinking they're not so bad, or even a great idea.  Sex is good, so let's just have it all the time and watch it and think about it all the time.  It's connected to love, and love is good, so it's fine.  NO!  False.  Big lie.  Any time you give something a bigger slice of the pie than it was meant to have, things go awry. 

Sure, it might be weird or foreign to hear that sex was meant for married people.  That's the way God wrote things.  Is that always the easiest way to live?  No.  I get that.  If this whole concept is new to you, that's OK.  Sometimes Jesus says things that take a while to think through.  He's not very politically correct, either.  Sometimes He straight up tells you that what you're doing is wrong, and there's a better way to live.  The funny thing is, He's always right.  

Now, I realize that reclaiming culture takes a long time, a lot of people doing smart cultural things, and a whole lot of Gospel.  But can we start today, in our own lives, gathering up our own armfuls of things we've given too much pie and take them out with the garbage?  Maybe that means you don't watch certain movies.  Maybe that means you start getting involved with people like the International Justice Mission, who are making a dent in the modern day slave trade.  Maybe you talk to your kids about how sex is a good thing, but only when you keep it where it belongs.  Maybe you toss those porn movies you've been hanging onto.  Whatever your maybe is, do it.  Take your one step to reclaim culture. 

Much love,

Little Miss Sunshine