Raindrops keep falling on my head.

Thursday was an icky day.  We'd had oodles of dreariness.  Clouds.  Rain.  Wind.  Icky, cold wintery coast weather.  (As my name implies, I don't do so well with lots of this kind of weather...)  The people around here keep apologizing for the weather.  I just tell them I'm excited for spring.  Back to Thursday.  I was just feeling evil and defeated.  You know that list of prayers that you should probably never pray like "God, please give me patience"?  Well, "Lord, please show me my sin" was the one I've been working through, and the answer wasn't pretty.  

SG and I had a good talk about some logistics of living together, which was good, but frustrating on my end.  I am continually reminded that the number of words I use in a day and the efficacy of my communication are not usually at equal levels.  Bah.  Then I start wondering if I'll ever be able to communicate with people well, and that's just a downer. 

So I betook myself to the sea, great expanse and muse of poets.  

Chacos in hand, I walked on the beach and listened to a sermon podcast from the Village Church.  It was about Moses leading the people toward the Promised Land.  He told God point blank, that if He wasn't going, neither were the children of Israel.  The sermon focused on relying on God to go before us every day.  I came back from that beachy stroll much encouraged that the God who began this good work is the same one who is not giving up on it.  

I found this phrase in a book I love, The Valley of Vision.  It's a book of prayers by old dead wise men and I love it.  One wrote:

     

        He is mine and I am his,

       Given to me as well as for me;

        I am never so much mine as when I am his

So yes, slowly, slowly I will become a better speaker of truth with love.  Slowly I will learn to run in a straight line.  Slowly I will look more and more like Jesus, and by extention, more and more like the self I was intended to be.

LMS