In my last post, I
addressed some things to the guys we dance with. Do smell good, do ask us to dance even if
you're not amazing, don't throw us like yoyos, etc. I thought it only fair to write to the other
half of the dancing population.
Being a girl, and not having the
corner market on male mind analysis, I outsourced. This is an expanded version of what the men I
talked to had to say.
Dear Ladies,
1. Follow the
leader.
Dancing is not a
three legged race. The party of the
first part and the party of the second part do not have equal… parts. It is the man's job to lead and the lady's
job to follow. I know, you're a 21st
century liberated, accomplished woman and you don't need a man to lead you
around by the hand. Well, this is
dancing, not the office, so let the man lead.
I don't care if you've studied under George Balanchine, don't try to
take over. It'll make you both look
bad. Guys aren't opposed to you teaching
them a new move now and then, but don't try to compete for the leadership
role.
"Be a good follower, i.e. let the guy lead.
"Just because I'm supposed to be leading doesn't
mean I know everything. If you know
something I don't, I'm willing and wanting to learn."
2. Forgive us our
peccadillos.
In short, guys feel
bad enough when they step on our toes or have choreographical freeze ups
without us giving them dirty looks. To
quote my sources…
"Be ok with laughing off mistakes."
"We will step on your feet. Every time.
Please don't get angry when we do."
Give them some
grace. They're trying to figure out how
to lead, where to twirl you next, and whether or not a dip is appropriate. When it comes to the question of "are we
human or are we dancers" (thanks, Killers) the answer is human.
3. Flash us a smile.
There's a lot of
pressure on guys when they dance with you.
As mentioned above, they’re attempting to multitask. In most cases, men are trying to lead you
around the dance floor and treat you like a lady. They might have two left feet. They might have never learned what it means
to treat a lady well, but they're trying.
I hate to compare our warrior poet/kinsmen redeemer/brave hearted hero
brothers to puppies, but when they're trying hard and having some successes,
smile at them! Let them know you
appreciate their efforts. Show them
you're having fun!
"Smile, relax, have fun… if you're not having
fun dancing, why are you doing it in the first place?"
"SMILE: a good sign he's doing a good job and
you're at least having fun even though he's stepping on your feet."
"If you're a better dancer, he probably already
knows this and there's no need to make him feel insecure."
4. Come dressed for
success.
I can endorse this
one with a Sunshine stamp of approval.
From a modesty standpoint, it's important to think about the duds you're
donning for a night of dancing. Don't
make guys feel awkward by deep v's down to your belly button. Not classy.
From a practical perspective, though, think through the kind of outfit
you'll need. Short skirts and passionate
twirling do not mix. Avoid straps that
you know will slide down your shoulders, it's annoying. Don't wear long sleeves and pants in the
summer, or you'll be uh, damp, and that's gross.
"Clothing choice is also something important,
not necessarily on the modesty issue, but on the ability of the clothes to
facilitate dancing (i.e. not heels or super tight dresses). Oh, slider shorts are a must."
5. Nod and smile
when we ask you to dance.
Ladies, I don't
quite understand this phenomenon, but women can scare the bravest of men just
by being women. It's hard for them to
ask us to dance. They sign million
dollar contracts, they do open heart surgeries, they take on 300lb linebackers
on the field, but when it comes to girls, they get a little weak in the
knees. I know, to us it doesn't seem
that complicated. We want to dance; they
ask us to dance; we say yes, but the poor guys are shaking in their boots, so
be nice and say yes.
"Dance with any guy who is brave enough to ask
(creepers are an exception)."
"She said yes, I said wow" - Brad Paisley
There you have it,
ladies, the inside scoop on what men appreciate on the dance floor. Thanks to all my inside sources!
Happy twirling,
Little Miss Sunshine
Sources
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